RSS

Monthly Archives: January 2010

Clothes Shopping-A BoobCast Flashback

31 Jan

Originally written on Oct. 26, 2009

This is another one of those issues that comes with being mostly boob-less.  Clothes shopping is frustrating.  I feel more comfortable in the Men’s section than the Women’s. The women’s section, even if there is no one else there, is a constant reminder of what I don’t have.

It’s also more difficult to find clothes that fit. Anything that fits tightly across the chest shows the outline of my deformity. And lets face it, most women’s clothing is geared to fit close to the body and accentuate our breasts. Even the camisoles with foam cups give a minor indication that something isn’t quite right because  of how the cups move since they’re not filled with breast tissue.

The men’s section offers a better selection of loose-fitting clothes. So I shop at Goodwill because I know that when this is over I can take the clothes back and donate them again. Someone else will be able to get use out of them when it’s all done.

Aside from this mangled thing that once was my chest, I think that shopping in the men’s section is one more reason I just don’t feel feminine. (see other Girly Girl posts).

Now in the movie “Dogma” the character called the Muse talked about how what defines a woman falls between two things…her legs. From a biological standpoint that IS true. Boys have a penis and girls have a vagina, after all. From a societal standpoint, however, women are judged by their breasts. If I don’t have breasts, am I still really a woman?

Breast cancer patients go through the same thing WHILE fighting a disease that could kill them. That’s why I can’t begin to compare myself to a breast cancer survivor. Not in the physical sense anyway. Mentally we go through much of the same thing. We question if we’re still actually women. We feel diminished; as though we’re somehow not fully human and wonder how our partners will EVER find us attractive again.

Yes, that complicated ball of emotions comes with clothes shopping. In the men’s section.

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on January 31, 2010 in anchor breast lift, Anxiety, boob job, breast, breast cancer, breast lift, breast size, breast volume, chemotherapy, complications, cosmetic surgery, deformity, Depression, emotional healing, emotional scars, Flashbacks, implants, mastopexy, necrosis, plastic surgeon, plastic surgery, Plastic Surgery Disaster, Post surgical depression, Surgical complications, Uncategorized

 

Octomom’s Plastic Surgery Denials

30 Jan

Yes, she’s in the news again. Whatever you may think of her, Nadya Suleman is still hot button for lots of people. Recently she’s been in the news yet again. This time Suleman is claiming that she lost 130 lbs simply by diet and exercise. Her new photos in The Star show a slender form but if you’ll look closely here http://bit.ly/4t9uwT , there isn’t the kind of muscle definition that normally comes from a high protein diet and regular workouts.

Close inspection of the photo also reveals a belly button that has been stretched vertically. When a tummy tuck is done, the skin is separated from the muscle layer, then pulled down towards the feet. The excess skin is trimmed off and a new belly button is cut.

Something else that might raise eyebrows is that, in that bikini photo, there is not a single stretch mark to be seen. If you’ll look at the photo of her hugely distended belly before she gave birth, you can plainly see the stretch marks http://bit.ly/xOTjv As any woman who has given birth knows, stretch marks do not magically disappear. Without some form of cosmetic surgery, they remain for the rest of a woman’s life.

With all this evidence, along with her previous denials regarding getting plastic surgery to look like Angelina Jolie, Suleman is on shaky ground. Cosmetic surgery has enough of a social stigma as it is. When a woman continually denies having work done, that denial enforces the idea that plastic surgery is bad and should be kept in the closet.

These kinds of denials not only confirm the notion that plastic surgery is bad but it forces people like myself who have suffered at the hands of inept surgeons deeper into the plastic surgery closet. What is the plastic surgery closet? It is the place that so many women feel forced to be when things go wrong with their own cosmetic procedures. When that happens, women feel they need to stay silent about the issue. Many even feel, as does a portion of the public, that they “deserve what they got”.

Botched cosmetic surgery is in the same place that breast cancer was 40 years ago. If something goes wrong, as difficult as it is, we need to talk about it. When it goes wrong, it’s a very lonely and scary place to be. There are no support groups for this, there is very little information because people are so ashamed.

It’s time to speak out. So right here and right now I am challenging Octomom to fess up. come on Nadya, we KNOW you’re lying so tell us the truth. Just admit it. To keep up this facade is hurting other women who look at you, berate themselves and wonder why they can’t be a “rubber band” like you.

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on January 30, 2010 in cosmetic surgery, Nadya Suleman, Octomom, plastic surgeon, plastic surgery, stretch marks, Surgery, tummy tuck, Uncategorized

 

Hiatus

24 Jan

BoobCast is going dark Jan 25 thru the 29th. I’m going to be out of the country celebrating my birthday on a cruise to the Bahamas. My actual birthday falls on the 30th so we’ll be back well before then.

I’ll resume regular posting when I get back.

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on January 24, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

Cross Fiber Friction Massage

23 Jan

Yesterday I had a long and very enlightening discussion with an experienced massage therapist. We talked about the plastic wrap sensation I have in my back still. He explained to me that after surgery sometimes adhesions form in the connective of fascia tissue.

An adhesion is a band of scar tissue that binds two parts of your tissue together. They should remain separate. Adhesions may appear as thin sheets of tissue similar to plastic wrap or as thick fibrous bands. The tissue develops when the body’s repair mechanisms respond to any tissue disturbance, such as surgery, infection, trauma, or radiation.

The massage therapist explained that he had dealt with adhesions before and they appear as described above: cable-like or thin sheets like mine. He talked about a deep tissue massage technique that is used with great success. it is called cross fiber friction massage.

In this technique the fascia, a strong connective tissue which performs a number of functions, including enveloping and isolating the muscles of the body, providing structural support and protection is manipulated in order to break up the adhesions.

Cross-fiber friction involves doing transverse movements to the connective tissues, like tendons and ligaments, in order to loosen up their fibers.This can be performed by opposing thumbs or the heal of the hand, especially on the iliotibial band, a band of muscle in the thigh.

So basically a trained massage therapist uses deep tissue massage going across the grain of the adhesions in order to break them up. This takes quite a few sessions. According to an article in Massage and Bodyworks Magazine, the therapist should keep your pain level at around a 6 on the 1-10 pain scale for 20-30 minutes per session.

The therapist I spoke to explained that yes, it IS uncomfortable and there is a great deal of deep breathing involved in a session. But once the adhesions are broken down it is easier for your body to heal. You will have better range of motion and, best of all, no more plastic wrap feeling!

Because the therapist I spoke to is so far away, I’m going to look into finding someone close by who has the experience to handle this. But before I go, I’m going to call Dr. Elliott’s office and talk to his nurse, Patti. I want a medical opinion on this before I go and do something that may cause me more harm than good.

As usual, I’ll let you all know how it goes.

 
2 Comments

Posted by on January 23, 2010 in adhesion, adhesions, breast reconstruction, complications, cosmetic surgery, cross fiber friction massage, fascia, Healing, Incisions, Latissimus flap, latissimus flap reconstruction, Pain, Pain Management, plastic surgeon, plastic surgery, Reconstruction, Recovery, Scars, Surgery, Surgical complications, Uncategorized

 

Bounce

21 Jan

I know that many of you are still up to your hip pockets in snow or freezing your assets off. Here in central Florida, it’s 81 degrees. Trust me. This IS relevant and it’s not (just) gloating.

Since it’s so warm I put on my favorite cami with a shelf bra. As I turned towards the mirror, I noticed that, thanks to the Twins, I have a distinct bounce in my step. So I raised myself up on my toes and experimented with a few tentative bounces.

I was mesmerized. For a good five minutes I watched the Twins spring up and down in a steady rhythm. And then I started to laugh. And cry. At the same time.

I am so grateful and SO relieved that there were minimal complications. Now even months later I am still occasionally overwhelmed by the simple fact that I have breasts instead of the magled wreckage I dealt with for so long.

If anyone wants to see a video of the bounce, let me know. I’d love to put one up.

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on January 21, 2010 in boob job, breast, breast reconstruction, cosmetic surgery, deformity, emotional healing, emotional scars, Healing, plastic surgeon, plastic surgery, Plastic Surgery Disaster, Reconstruction, Recovery, Surgery, Surgical complications, Uncategorized

 

Our First Story

20 Jan

Our first story is one that was told to me a few months ago. A woman I spoke with told me about her 67 year old mother. We’ll call her Barbara for the sake of this narrative.

Barbara is a cancer survivor. She had a mastectomy on one side and reconstructive surgery later. He daughter didn’t share with me the length of time between the mastectomy and the reconstruction. It is generally suggested that a woman either get reconstruction done immediately after a mastectomy (breast removal) or wait two years for the chemotherapy to be completely out of the system.

The chemicals used in chemo affect the circulation and can interfere with healing after surgery. As a side note, chemo can also leave behind little blue spots in the skin.

Barbara opted to wait and still developed necrosis. Her daughter didn’t share with me how severe it was. She only told me that her mother was SO sick of surgeries that she decided not to have the damage repaired. Barbara said that at her age she just didn’t want to deal with any more of it.

That is a pretty standard attitude with people who have been through a great deal of medical treatment. It’s exhausting. It eats away pieces of your life and by the time you’re done, you just don’t want to deal with any more.

I’m still looking for plastic and reconstruction surgery stories to share so please email them to boobcast@gmail.com. All names are kept confidential unless otherwise requested.

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on January 20, 2010 in breast cancer, breast health, breast reconstruction, chemotherapy, chemotherapy chemical, complications, Medical, necrosis, plastic surgeon, plastic surgery, Plastic Surgery Disaster, Reconstruction, Recovery, Surgery, Surgical complications, Uncategorized

 

A Call To Arms

19 Jan

I have been telling my story since October 2008. Now it’s winding down. It isn’t over but until we can afford nipple reconstruction, my tale is in a holding pattern.

Now it’s YOUR turn. Tell me your story so that I can share it with others. All names will remain completely confidential unless otherwise requested. This is about getting the word out to every woman who is considering cosmetic surgery. I want ALL your stories; the failures, the successes and everything in between.

We know there is a social stigma attached to plastic surgery. Too many women are silent. It’s time to let your voice be heard! So speak out! Share your stories and be a light in the darkness for someone else who may be going through what you have been through!

Email your stories to BoobCast@gmail.com

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on January 19, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

The 200th Post

18 Jan

As the title says, this is the 200th installment of BoobCast. Today I am writing about you, dear reader. Today’s installment is all about the support and the stories that people have shared with me since I first started this blog on Oct. 11, 2008.

When I first started writing this, I was also fairly active on a website called All About Plastic Surgery (http://www.allaboutplasticsurgery.com). When I posted what had happened to me it didn’t take long before I was inundated by questions about various aspects of the surgery. You can find that entry here: http://boobcast.net/2008/10/14/questions/ People expressed a great deal of concern about how well I had checked out the surgeon, what indications I might have had and what legal recourse I might have taken. During that period so many people gave their support and I am grateful for it. So my thanks goes out to the women of the All About Plastic Surgery forum. They were the ones who inspired the idea for BoobCast.

Now you’re probably asking yourself, “Gee Maria, why do you call it BoobCast? Were they wrapped in plaster or something at one point?”

No, dear reader. There are reasons this site is called BoobCast.  In 2007 the podcasting community lost a precious member by the name of Joe Murphy. He died of a vicious type of cancer that took him quickly. During his medical treatments he talked in vivid detail about what was going on, the testing and all of it. His strength inspired me. I wanted to be as strong and as brave as Joe Murphy. So I planned to podcast what was going on with my breast necrosis. The name of that podcast was going to be BoobCast.

I never met Joe but his life inspired me. It just turns out that I’m not that strong or that brave. To honor that bravery I have kept the name.

I also owe thanks to a very dear friend, Tee Morris. When I was trying to find the strength to create BoobCast, He was there for me. He gave me mental and emotional support by letting me know that I *could* do it. I’m sorry I disapointed you Tee but want to thank you for being a friend when I needed one.

In the time I’ve been writing BoobCast I have had people email me directly for advice. Of course, after reading the email, my advice was always “Contact your PS (plastic surgeon) and ask for [fill-in-the-blank]. Whether it was about bruising, skin texture or pain, I advised talking to their doctor. If they couldn’t get a decent answer from that doctor, talk to another one.

The one that really broke my heart was the husband of a woman who, a few days previous the email,  had the same procedure I had. According to her husband, the pain pills her PS had given her weren’t doing much and she was in constant pain. She couldn’t eat or sleep and she was suffering. I told her husband to call her PS immediately and insist on different pain meds and not take NO for an answer. i explained that, right now it was his job to advocate for his wife since she couldn’t do it herself.

A couple days later I got an email from him saying that her PS had changed her meds and she was doing MUCH better. It’s emails like those that made BoobCast well worth the emotional pain of writing those early posts.

I also want to thank everyone who talked to me about BoobCast at DragonCon last year. Being told in person that I’m making a difference means the world to me. Thank you for taking the time to talk to me.

Finally, my thanks to Carol Montoya, Lolly Daskal and the Woman At Denny’s. I promise that once I’ve had nipple reconstruction and recuperate from that, I WILL write the book. The foundation is in the works already.

My thanks to you all for reading, commenting and talking to me. Here’s to another 200!

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on January 18, 2010 in anchor breast lift, Anxiety, barter, boob job, Bra Fitting, bra sizes, Bras, breast, breast cancer, breast health, breast implants, breast lift, breast reconstruction, breast size, breast volume, Cash fees, checkup, chemotherapy chemical, clogged surgical drains, communication, complications, compression bra, compression dressing, cortisone, cosmetic surgery, cryotherapy, debreiding, debridement, deformity, dehiscence, Depression, Drain, Drugs, emotional healing, emotional scars, Excise, excise fluid, fear, Flashbacks, flourouracil, Fluid, granular tissue, granulation tissue, Healing, Hospital, Hospital fees, Hosptial Costs, implants, Incisions, Infection, Insurance, interferon, Invisibility, keloid, keloid scars, laser, Latissimus flap, latissimus flap reconstruction, malpractice, mammogram, mastopexy, Medical, Medical Insurance, memory, Nausea, necrosis, negligence, Nipple prosthetics, Nipple reconstruction, Nipples, Pain, Pain Management, plastic surgeon, plastic surgery, Plastic Surgery Disaster, podcast, Post surgical depression, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Prescription Drug Addiction, Prosthetics, PTSD, radiation, Reconstruction, Recovery, Scars, Seroma, serous fluid, Sex, silicone sheets, situational depression, Sleep, slow healing, suicide, Surgery, Surgical complications, Surgical drains, Surgical Fees, Ta Ta Tuesday, Uncategorized, V.A.C. machine, Vacuum assisted wound closure, wet to dry bandages, wheelchair

 

The Great Boobie Debate

17 Jan

Wide Set Breasts

This is the great thing about reconstructive and plastic surgery. To some small extent you can personalize your body. Plastic surgery doesn’t allow for you to put your boobs back where they were when you were 16.  The lack of skin elasticity and human anatomy doesn’t allow for that. Nor can you have close-set breasts like the example below if you naturally have wide set breasts like the example to the right. Biology plays a large role in the limitations of surgical science.

To some extent you can request what you want in the realm of size but even that has it’s limitations. If you are an A cup, trying to go directly to a DDD cup is simply not possible because the amount of skin and tissue an A cup breast has available is much less than a DDD cup breast. There has to be enough tissue to cover the implant.

There ARE things that we *can* chose though. It just has to be within physical limits. I have decided that I do want to have nipple reconstruction. The articles I have read (I posted these in previous posts) indicate that large nipples tend to collapse in a short period of time. The truth is a reconstructed nipple will never rise and become stiff with stimulation. It is made from breast tissue and not the erectile tissue that natural nipples are made of.

I still cannot find the story and I’m not certain it’s even true. I have read that in Japan, in order to increase protrusion, surgeons implant pearls under the skin. If someone can confirm or deny this, I would really appreciate it. I have also read that nipple piercing increases protrusion. I’d also like to hear from nipple reconstruction patients that have had their nipples pierced in order to improve protrusion

This site gives examples of the various types of nipple enhancement. http://bit.ly/6jiVx8 None of them seem to include a pearl. However there IS mention of cartilage as an implant. I’m going to do more research on that and get back to you.

Close Set breasts

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on January 17, 2010 in boob job, breast, breast health, breast implants, breast lift, breast reconstruction, breast size, breast volume, cosmetic surgery, implants, mastopexy, Nipple prosthetics, Nipple reconstruction, Nipples, plastic surgery, Plastic Surgery Disaster, Prosthetics, Reconstruction, Surgery, Surgical complications, Uncategorized

 

Back Strength

16 Jan

One of the aftereffects of a latissimus flap breast reconstruction Dr. Elliott told me about was back weakness. Since my back has one or two less layers of muscle, it only stands to reason that it’s not going to be as strong as it was.

For those of you who are not familiar with the reconstruction procedure, visit this site for a really good overview: http://www.optionsforbreastreconstruction.com/lat-dorsi.html

My concern currently is that I only go for about 30 minutes of constant activity while standing up without pain. I was out with Hubby on Friday hitting up garage sales and running other errands for about five hours. After three yard sales and by the time we finished up at Verizon, I was done for the rest of the day. I was hitting about a 5-6 on the pain scale and my back was so weak. I spent the afternoon and evening sitting in my recliner.

Interestingly the corseted feeling caused by the scar tissue under my skin is no longer nearly as severe as it used to be. It’s almost completely gone now though there are still days when my back is tight.

I wish I knew more about the back weakness issue. Web sites I have consulted talk about minor to moderate issues with it. I wouldn’t call this severe, but I WOULD call it frustrating as all hell. Granted I am not what one would call physically fit. I wasn’t to begin with. My record for being at one of the Disney parks is 14 hours. Ten hours was our average. That’s my form of exercise. Now eight hours is the most I can handle.

The worst thing is bending over. I can do it about 3-4 times. At 5, it starts to hurt and at 6-7 my back starts to seize up. Add walking to bending over and I’m pretty well trashed. I would have thought that sitting would have helped. While it does keep me from being in major pain, I feel really weak and it’s hard to get up.

Really, after the activities yesterday, I felt the way I did about three months out of surgery. It’s been nine months today and I expected to be completely healed by now. It is SO DAMNED FRUSTRATING!!!

What frustrates me even more is that I don’t know if this muscle pain is the same as when I used to work out too hard or if my body is still healing and I should take it easier on myself. I don’t know what the right balance is. I think I’ll be calling Dr. Elliot’s office on Monday and talk to his nursing staff about this.

I’ll update you all when I know something. In the mean time, today will consist of sitting on my ass and doing nothing

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on January 16, 2010 in breast, breast reconstruction, complications, cosmetic surgery, Latissimus flap, latissimus flap reconstruction, Pain, plastic surgeon, plastic surgery, Reconstruction, Recovery, Scars, slow healing, Surgery, Surgical complications, Uncategorized

 
← Older posts
 
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,132 other followers