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Category Archives: dehiscence

My Legal Settlement

Earlier today I received the following email from a regular reader here at the blog. For personal reasons, the reader has asked that they be kept anonymous.

Maria,

In your blog, you said you signed papers with your doctor not to name them. Did you have a settlement? Did you have the option not to settle, instead spread their name all over? Or did an attorney advice you about libel or defamation?

If you can comment without naming the doctor, much appreciated.

I have written before about how I tried to deal with the legal ramifications of what happened to me. I also wrote about the settlement that currently binds me from mentioning the name of the surgeon. HOWEVER, before I agreed to the settlement that prohibits me and my “agents” from mentioning the surgeon’s name, I wrote a few posts. Those are listed below in my response to the reader’s questions.

Dear Reader;

I am, unfortunately, also bound from talking about the terms of the settlement as well. I DID have the option not to settle. At that point I was deeply clinically depressed and traumatized. I didn’t want that person to have anything to do with my medical care any more. I would start shaking every time I had an appointment. I just wanted it to be over with so I went with the first available way out.

People keep telling me that I’m brave. This is one of those instances where I was not. I DID put up a synopsis of what happened on the Complaints Board [Editor's Note: This post has been edited on advice from my lawyer.Please visit the link for details]

I never spoke to a lawyer about defamation, but I was a journalist so I know that once I signed those papers, I am legally bound, along with my “agents”, not to reveal his name. HOWEVER, those two links were written up before the contract went into effect.

Here is where things get interesting. I just happened to notice that a person I am presuming is the doctor in question or one of the 2-3 staff members familiar with the case (aka one of his “agents”), made a brief response to my initial post on the Complaints Board. I am presuming this because of the use of the phrase “ridiculous herbal remedy’ in the response. That is FAR too personal to have been written by someone just reading entries on the complaints board.

And so, dear reader, I am going to war. For some reason I am having technical difficulties logging on and making a response to that accusation. Once I do, you all may want to stop by for a look because I can guarantee that things are going to get very, VERY interesting.

This surgeon does not know with whom he is messing. He’s about to find out.

The 200th Post

18 Jan

As the title says, this is the 200th installment of BoobCast. Today I am writing about you, dear reader. Today’s installment is all about the support and the stories that people have shared with me since I first started this blog on Oct. 11, 2008.

When I first started writing this, I was also fairly active on a website called All About Plastic Surgery (http://www.allaboutplasticsurgery.com). When I posted what had happened to me it didn’t take long before I was inundated by questions about various aspects of the surgery. You can find that entry here: http://boobcast.net/2008/10/14/questions/ People expressed a great deal of concern about how well I had checked out the surgeon, what indications I might have had and what legal recourse I might have taken. During that period so many people gave their support and I am grateful for it. So my thanks goes out to the women of the All About Plastic Surgery forum. They were the ones who inspired the idea for BoobCast.

Now you’re probably asking yourself, “Gee Maria, why do you call it BoobCast? Were they wrapped in plaster or something at one point?”

No, dear reader. There are reasons this site is called BoobCast. In 2007 the podcasting community lost a precious member by the name of Joe Murphy. He died of a vicious type of cancer that took him quickly. During his medical treatments he talked in vivid detail about what was going on, the testing and all of it. His strength inspired me. I wanted to be as strong and as brave as Joe Murphy. So I planned to podcast what was going on with my breast necrosis. The name of that podcast was going to be BoobCast.

I never met Joe but his life inspired me. It just turns out that I’m not that strong or that brave. To honor that bravery I have kept the name.

I also owe thanks to a very dear friend, Tee Morris. When I was trying to find the strength to create BoobCast, He was there for me. He gave me mental and emotional support by letting me know that I *could* do it. I’m sorry I disapointed you Tee but want to thank you for being a friend when I needed one.

In the time I’ve been writing BoobCast I have had people email me directly for advice. Of course, after reading the email, my advice was always “Contact your PS (plastic surgeon) and ask for [fill-in-the-blank]. Whether it was about bruising, skin texture or pain, I advised talking to their doctor. If they couldn’t get a decent answer from that doctor, talk to another one.

The one that really broke my heart was the husband of a woman who, a few days previous the email, had the same procedure I had. According to her husband, the pain pills her PS had given her weren’t doing much and she was in constant pain. She couldn’t eat or sleep and she was suffering. I told her husband to call her PS immediately and insist on different pain meds and not take NO for an answer. i explained that, right now it was his job to advocate for his wife since she couldn’t do it herself.

A couple days later I got an email from him saying that her PS had changed her meds and she was doing MUCH better. It’s emails like those that made BoobCast well worth the emotional pain of writing those early posts.

I also want to thank everyone who talked to me about BoobCast at DragonCon last year. Being told in person that I’m making a difference means the world to me. Thank you for taking the time to talk to me.

Finally, my thanks to Carol Montoya, Lolly Daskal and the Woman At Denny’s. I promise that once I’ve had nipple reconstruction and recuperate from that, I WILL write the book. The foundation is in the works already.

My thanks to you all for reading, commenting and talking to me. Here’s to another 200!

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Posted by Maria_Myrback on January 18, 2010 in anchor breast lift, Anxiety, barter, boob job, Bra Fitting, bra sizes, Bras, breast, breast cancer, breast health, breast implants, breast lift, breast reconstruction, breast size, breast volume, Cash fees, checkup, chemotherapy chemical, clogged surgical drains, communication, complications, compression bra, compression dressing, cortisone, cosmetic surgery, cryotherapy, debreiding, debridement, deformity, dehiscence, Depression, Drain, Drugs, emotional healing, emotional scars, Excise, excise fluid, fear, Flashbacks, flourouracil, Fluid, granular tissue, granulation tissue, Healing, Hospital, Hospital fees, Hosptial Costs, implants, Incisions, Infection, Insurance, interferon, Invisibility, keloid, keloid scars, laser, Latissimus flap, latissimus flap reconstruction, malpractice, mammogram, mastopexy, Medical, Medical Insurance, memory, Nausea, necrosis, negligence, Nipple prosthetics, Nipple reconstruction, Nipples, Pain, Pain Management, plastic surgeon, plastic surgery, Plastic Surgery Disaster, podcast, Post surgical depression, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Prescription Drug Addiction, Prosthetics, PTSD, radiation, Reconstruction, Recovery, Scars, Seroma, serous fluid, Sex, silicone sheets, situational depression, Sleep, slow healing, suicide, Surgery, Surgical complications, Surgical drains, Surgical Fees, Ta Ta Tuesday, Uncategorized, V.A.C. machine, Vacuum assisted wound closure, wet to dry bandages, wheelchair

How To Tell?

12 Nov

This post is going to be even more personal that I usually am about my experiences. Those who have issues with bisexuality or sex outside of marriage should skip this post and come back tomorrow for more about dehisience.

First, for anyone that hasn’t read my Twitter or Facebook profile or doesn’t know me personally, I’m bisexual. That means that I am attracted to both men and women. Not ALL men and not ALL women. Just, well, just the ones I think are cute.

When I realize six years ago that I’m attracted to both genders, hubby and I sat down and we had a series of discussions. Several of those discussions covered dating. Thanks to a book called “The Bisexual’s Guide To The Universe” we laid down rules that we were both comfortable with so that I could actually experience what it would be like to be with another woman.

That was four years ago.

I’ve been on a few dates and even had a short term girlfriend. Nothing ever happened though.

Now I’ve met someone and I like her. If things keep progressing I can see where this might go.

But there’s a problem.

I have NO idea how to tell her about what happened. How do you tell someone that you’re…incomplete? I’m sure divorced and single cancer survivors have had to go through this. And I understand that it’s not just something you blurt out.

Nothing puts a damper on a fun evening like “Oh by the way my boobs rotted off, I had to get them reconstructed and in case I haven’t freaked you out enough yet, I have no nipples.”.

Yeah. THAT’S a real show stopper.

I don’t want to just give her my blog URL either. That’s a WHOLE lot of trauma right there as my regular readers know. And I REALLY like this woman. I don’t want to scare her away.

I’m thinking that if or when this turns romantic, that’s when I’ll tell her. But I have to tell her soon enough that it doesn’t seem like I’m keeping secrets but not so soon that I scare her off. She’s had to deal with enough medical crap herself lately as it is.

As for the actual telling part, I’ve learned that starting with the phrase “We need to talk.” or “There’s something I have to tell you”. usually sets someone on edge. I need to find an opener that will set her at ease. Maybe “There’s something I want to trust you with”. Perhaps “Can I confide in you?”.

I guess this is just something I’m going to have to work on. I’ve got about a week before I see her next, so I have a bit of time. Trust me, you all will probably hear about this again.

After all you already know that Ken enjoys the Twins and he doesn’t seem to care that I don’t have nipples yet. But that’s because my first set was so sensitive that he couldn’t really do anything with them anyway. This is definitely a different twist to this tale though.

The ER – Pt. 2

11 Nov

Let’s hope I can finish this part of the story tonight. I genuinely feel like I’m going to throw up. It’s amazing how visceral my reactions still are even after all this time.

By this point I was absolutely furious but I felt totally helpless to do anything. The news that I couldn’t be stitched back up was devastating. Couple that with the results of the culture and I was even more of a basket case than before. The culture discovered five different types of bacteria: three of which the tech never even heard of. So they put up a bag of the most badass antibiotics they had.

Unfortunately about 1/2 way through the bag I started getting EXTREMELY itchy. My throat started swelling a few minutes later and it became a bit difficult to breathe. Well Ken called the nurse and within a minute or so he had a syringe of something in the IV. He SLAMMED the plunger in and within moments I felt like I was going to pass out.

I got tunnel vision and then the tunnel started narrowing. My body felt very heavy and I felt like I was being pushed down. I told the nurse that I thought I was going to pass out. His reply was “Isn’t it a good thing you’re in the hospital then?”.

So…yeah. I was allergic to the first antibiotic. So they put up something else really badass and I was off again. This one made me a little itchy too so the nurse injected a little syringe of something else. This time much more slowly. In a matter of moments I was doing just fine and made it through the entire bag.

After a bag and a half of serious antibiotics, they also made an appointment for me with an infection specialist. Then one of the nurses packed my chest and they sent me home.

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Posted by Maria_Myrback on November 11, 2009 in anchor breast lift, Anxiety, boob job, breast health, breast lift, complications, cosmetic surgery, dehiscence, Depression, Hospital, mastopexy, plastic surgeon, plastic surgery, Plastic Surgery Disaster, situational depression, Surgery, Surgical complications, Uncategorized

The ER

10 Nov

When we got into the ER they did the usual. Took my vitals and all that jazz. My blood pressure was, of course, elevated. No fever though, which was a very good thing. Fever marks a systemic infection.

Once they got all the usual stuff out of the way, I undressed and showed the nurse what was going on. This was the first time I had seen a medical professional’s eyes bug out. The nurse didn’t actually SAY anything negative though I could tell she was thinking “HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!!”.

She took a culture of the open area and got me hooked up to an IV. The goal became to prevent systemic infection since I had an open wound the size of a silver dollar. So one of the techs put up a full bag of antibiotic and let it go through the drip.

While that was going, I asked about getting stitched back up. That’s when I got the bad news. Unfortunately when sutures start to go like that, there’s nothing they can do about it. I was told that if they did stitch it back up, it would only tear open again.

Much later I found out that there are different types of stitches. The person who stitched me up apparently didn’t use the type that was for heavy people like myself. Unlike Dr. Elliott’s reconstruction, the HiQ only used a single layer of sutures. That’s probably one of the other reasons I started unraveling.

Sorry folks. I’m just all over the place tonight. I’ll continue this story tomorrow.

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Posted by Maria_Myrback on November 10, 2009 in dehiscence, Uncategorized

Undone

07 Nov

Two weeks after the repair surgery I noticed that the stitches on the left side right above the open area were starting to come undone.

No. I’m not kidding. Nor am I exaggerating. The stitches slowly began to unravel. They called it dehiscence. My research implies that is when the edges of the wound separate. What happened here, however was that the catgut, nylon or whatever it is that comprised the stitches came apart and became more and more lose until the catgut or nylon was poking out and the edges of the wound was beginning to come apart.

And I thought I was horrified before?? HA! On top of that, I was downright pissed off at the Hack In Question because the fucker was on vacation. AGAIN! Oh and you think THAT’S a trip, try this one on for size: If you are under the care of a plastic surgeon in Florida, no other plastic surgeon will even LOOK at you!!

When the stitches started to loosen I was told that no one could see me at the HiQ’s office because he wasn’t there. So I called around to local plastic surgeons. I actually got into the office of one of the locals only to be told that I couldn’t be seen.

So I went home and the stitches continued to slowly unravel. As they lostened more, the skin pulled against them harder and I began unravelling faster. And STILL the Hack was out of touch. His office couldn’t or wouldn’t do anything for me. So finally when I was about 1/3 of the way undone I went to the emergency room. It was the only place that was left as far as I could tell.

I’ll talk about that adventure tomorrow. Unfortunately I don’t have it in me to do more than short burts.

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Posted by Maria_Myrback on November 7, 2009 in dehiscence, Uncategorized

Briefs

19 Jul

***I’m STILL waiting for a call from Dr. Elliott regarding the whole weight loss/losing boobie volume issue. This is really the first time I’ve actually been truly disappointed with him. He didn’t call last week nor did his PA. Needless to say I’m somewhat miffed. I’ll be looking for an explanation when I call on Monday. I know he sees patients then.

***I heard back from Paul about the prosthetic nipples. He said he can do anything I want. So NOW all I have to do is decide what I want. Not as easy as it sounds. If I decide not to opt for surgery, these babies are my nips for life. Or until the wear out and I have to get new ones.

Mail order nipples… Now THERE’S a modern concept for ya.

***A friend of mine from another site who just recently started reading my blog said that I need to “pull myself out of the Abyss”. Someone else pointed out that the word “survivor” is frequently used as a crutch. Now THAT took the wind out of my sails. Those two comments have me wondering just how much of this blog consists of me whining about how truly awful things have been. I would LIKE to think that there is some helpful information in all of this. As for pulling myself out of the Abyss, THAT is what this blog is about for me. I have been in some very dark places since this all began. The things I’ve been discussing are surface issues by comparison. I know I still have healing to do.

There are times when I’m not very good at recognizing my limitations and boundaries. This is one of those times. I’m still somewhat enmeshed in the misery I suffered. Some days it clings to me like cobwebs. I wonder how much longer this sorrow will be with me. I suspect it will be years more because I have a book to write.

I also have allowed a few people to have a great deal of influence in my life. I wonder sometimes how much I’m doing just to make them happy and how much of what I do are things that *I* want for me. It’s difficult when I can’t seem to separate my desires from theirs FOR me. Not long ago I was explaining to someone that I tend to analyze the crap out of everything. So I am. It’s just part of the “Maria” package.

***That troublesome spot on my back has mostly scabbed over. Now it’s just a matter of time before it completely heals up. The wet-to-dry bandages really helped. The other side that had separated and scabbed is healed up now and has blended into the rest of the scar line.

***Intimacy has the most beautiful bras and panties for DDD+ cup sizes. The engineering that goes into these bras is phenomenal. Unfortunately, their customer service is HORRIBLE! I’ve had to keep calling multiple times to check on a back order. I called three times and left two messages before someone called me back to let me know that my original fitter was no longer with the company. Then it took 20 minutes for them to find my original back order paperwork and verify that those items were ones I still wanted. At that point, after being placed on hold for about 5 minutes I was told they were out of stock but would be getting them in soon.

Six weeks later I got a message saying that my back order was in. So I called back, ended up leaving two messages in a week and FINALLY got a human being a week after that. It took another 20 minutes to find and verify my back order ONLY to be told that they were out of one item that I ordered and it would have to be shipped from the Boston store.

If Intimacy could just get their act together customer service-wise, they would be more popular than Victoria’s Secret. Intimacy’s lingerie is better made, more supportive and will last longer. PLUS they offer life time tailoring. If you lose a substantial amount of weight, they will tailor your bras to fit as many times as you want.

Bra Day Redux

13 Jul

After wearing my pretty blue Prima Donna Kensington bra (http://tinyurl.com/npkxnm) and panties today, I have great news to report. The skin on my back has healed sufficiently so as to not tear under pressure the way it did last time I tried to wear a bra. That was right after my one month check up.

I wore the bra for about 9 hours today and found it to be VERY comfortable. I only had to adjust the band once. I’ve also healed enough to be able to feel the bra strap on my back. For the most part at least. My nerves have not completely healed yet. There are still areas of numbness but not to the extent that they were. Those numb areas are actually getting more pronounced feeling as time passes. Eventually I’ll actually be able to feel everything on my back again.

In other words, if my fingers slip and I snap myself with my bra band, I now KNOW I snapped myself. Sometimes pain is something to grudgingly accept. In this case it indicates progress in healing.

Yay pain??

I’m not sure if this progress means that I’m going to dive head first into daily bra wearing again. Somehow, I don’t think so. The bras are beautiful and they do lovely things for the TWINS, as you have all borne witness to. I’m really rather enjoying using the shelf bras though. Even though the Prima Donna bras ARE comfortable, the shelf bras are even more comfortable.

While I do think I’ll be wearing bras more often, I think that for the time being I’m going to stick with my shelf bras as my daily wear mainstay. That may change with a little more time. I’m just going to have to take it as it comes and see what happens. As usual.

9 1/2 Weeks

23 Jun

From the title of the post, it’s pretty obvious what today’s topic is.

Medical updates.

The spot on my back is still troublesome. It’s not really getting any better. I’m still not too worried about it though as no one else at Dr. Elliott’s office is overly concerned. Last night Ken said he thinks I should “be seen” by Dr. Elliott’s contemporary down here, Dr. Roxanne Guy. I have an appointment for Thursday.

Honestly, I am SICK of “being seen”. I am SO over all of this medical crap. I just want to get ON with my life. I think that’s part of the reason I’ve started doing Ta Ta Tuesday. Even though I may not be completely done with all of this, I want to start enjoying the completion of the major stage.

The nurse at Dr. Elliott’s office had suggested that I wait another month to take the tape off the suture line. I got tired of waiting so I went ahead and took the tapes off four days early. Really I could have taken the tapes off at 6 weeks but I tend to be overly cautious as far as suture lines go.

I haven’t taken any acetaminophen for pain in a few days. I’m happy about that. It’s definitely a few steps ahead of where I was. My endurance, however, is another matter all together. I used to be able to be at Disney for anywhere from 12 to 14 hours. Now I can’t walk around for more than a couple hours without getting worn out. It’s possible that the heat could be exacerbating the issue, but I just don’t think so.

Mobility is another issue. I can raise my left arm all the way up next to my head. The skin in my armpit is still a little tight. My right arm is another matter. I can only raise it at a 55 or 60 degree angle without tightness and pain. It HAS improved since surgery. It’s just improving more slowly.

Emotionally I’m doing better, as the idea of TaTa Tuesday shows. I’m still trying to decide if I want to take a chance on nipple reconstruction. Some articles say that in experienced hands the failure rate is less than 2%. On other websites I’ve read women’s stories of how their nipples flattened out between six months to 2 years. There was also a fairly high incident of infection.

I have emailed Dr. Elliott and asked him to suggest someone who makes custom silicone nipples and write a letter of request. Every prosthetics maker I have found that does really good hand painted nipples requires a letter from a physician. Even if I decide to have the surgery later, I will still have the prosthetics in the mean time.

Under There

20 Jun

HA! Just made you say “Underwear”!

Seriously though folks, because of the relatively minor issues with slow healing on my back in a couple spots, I’m wearing camisoles either as my top or as an undershirt. It took me a while to find ones with half way decent support. I’ve found that shelf bras with wide eleastic bands do a pretty decent job. I found a bunch at Kohl’s on sale for $9.99 each. They have thin shoulder straps but the band is pretty wide so that sort of makes up for it.

I found two others at Macy’s with wide elastic shoulder straps and a wide band. I like those better as they tend to give better support. Unfortunately it’s summer in Florida and it is already reaching 99 degrees in the afternoons. I can only wear those once as undershirts before having to wash them. It IS nice just throwig on a cami and capris when I need to run out the door though.

I have all these pretty bras and panties and I still can’t wear any of them until these areas on my back are completely healed. Which brings me to a major complaint about Intimacy. I am STILL missing two pairs of panties. A couple weeks ago I got a call from a manager asking me if I had gotten everything. I let her know what I was still missing and that I had called leaving a message saying as much but never got a call back. She told me that she would investigate and call me back. I STILL have not heard from her.

I’m getting ticked off about this. They have such wonderful products but such hideous customer service that it’s really no longer worth it to shop there. For THAT kind of money per piece I expect MUCH better service. I will, of course, keep you all up to date about what happens. I WILL have my matching panties or someone will be dealing with an extraordinarilly pissed off Maria. That is NOT something anyone wants.

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Posted by Maria_Myrback on June 20, 2009 in boob job, Bra Fitting, Bras, breast, breast reconstruction, cosmetic surgery, dehiscence, Healing, Incisions, Infection, Latissimus flap, latissimus flap reconstruction, Medical, plastic surgery, Plastic Surgery Disaster, podcast, Reconstruction, Recovery, Scars, Surgery, Surgical complications, Uncategorized

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Boobcast

Category Archives: dehiscence

My Legal Settlement

The 200th Post

How To Tell?

The ER – Pt. 2

The ER

Undone

Briefs

Bra Day Redux

9 1/2 Weeks

Under There

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